Drab insults Mike Rizzo over his Opening Day suit selection

Chris Lingebach
March 29, 2019 - 12:38 pm

Junkies producer Drab T-shirt inadvertently insulted Nationals General Manager and President of Baseball Operations Mike Rizzo not once, but twice on Opening Day.

I can confirm the veracity of the first incident, because I witnessed it firsthand. 

The Junks were invited to Nationals Park to broadcast their show from the field on Opening Day on Friday, a prestigious honor, to be sure. 

Rizzo was scheduled to make a 9 a.m. in-person appearance, but being the punctual man that he is, he arrived seven minutes early.

With The Junks in the middle of a segment, that left Drab with the important task of keeping Rizzo mildly entertained for a few minutes, until he could sit down with The Junks, who do that sort of thing – but well – for a living.

As JP explained on Friday's show, Drab's "got to small-talk with Mike Rizzo. He's in a panic, because we're still on the air. Mike arrives seven minutes early. Now Drab has to engage Rizzo for what could potentially be three or four minutes."

"I should have just stuck with the handshake and walked away," Drab said. "I was 0-for-2 yesterday, actually. The first thing I said is – I'm such an idiot, same thing JP did – I said, 'Hey, is that a Stitched suit? Mike takes great pride in what he wears, and I'm sure Stitched puts out great products, but they gave him a suit the night before for the Gala."

"So you guys automatically think he has a whole closet filled with suits from that place," Cakes said.

"Yeah. Like, why would I assume that everything he wears is from Stitched?" Drab sanctioned himself, appropriately. "And he goes, 'Um, no.'"

I can confirm this, too, and that Drab immediately turned to me, got that big toothy grin that he gets, where the corners of his eyes fasten shut, and he let out one of those all-too-familiar Drab heh-heh-heh chuckles.

"It was probably Versace or something like that," Drab explained his blunder.

Yeah. It probably was. Visual evidence in the photo above (clearly, on its surface, an expensive suit).

The awkwardness didn't stop there.

Drab continues his onslaught: "So I started scrambling and I remembered that he's a partner in a local restaurant that just opened up. It's called Dudley's, in Shirlington. I go, 'Hey Mike... I've heard great things about Duffy's!'"

Fortunately for all involved (especially Rizzo), JP kicked off the interview by making the exact same judgment error.

JP: "But, I mean, he's looking sharp. Do you have another Stitched suit?"

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