Alan May: Hockey players' butts are too big for jeans

Chris Lingebach
January 15, 2019 - 7:31 pm
Alan May: Hockey players' butts are too big for jeans

Jerome Miron-USA TODAY Sports

There's a reason you don't see hockey players out and about in jeans much.

"They have these small waists but they've got a big butt," Alan May enlightened Junkies listeners on The Morning Skate, presented by D.C. Lottery. "And then they've got huge quads."

May, who last played in the NHL pre-online shopping, says, although it was impossible finding jeans that fit back in 1995, it's still nearly as impossible today.

"You can't just order jeans, you've got to try everything on," he said. "And now the way these guys train, they're all like tennis players. Tennis players never look that big until you're in person. They're a smallish upper body and a huge core, big thighs, and hockey players are built a lot like tennis players now.

"It's a different game. It's all the explosive training they do. It's hilarious. Guys cannot find clothes, and then when your career ends, all of it just disappears in the first year. Some guys get super heavy, but most of the guys just lose all their weight and all their muscle the first year they're done."

That's why you're more likely to spot a hockey player in a pair of Lululemons than a pair of dungarees. 

"Back when I played, I had a waist that was 28 to 30 inches at all times," said May. "And my last few years, I weighed just under 210 pounds. But my first year I was done, and my thighs used to hold my jeans up – you know, my quads and all that – so the seat of my pants was always tight. And then you look at my first year I was done playing, before I realized it, I weighed about 170 pounds, 175 pounds.

"I quit working out. I worked 18 hours a day, I owned my own minor league hockey team and I still had all the same clothes. And my belt notches, I was having to poke holes in my belts to put a different belt size. It seemed like I was living on nothing and just working all the time, and I remember my pants would be falling down all the time. Until I got my wallet out and started buying some new clothes, I had a problem keeping my pants on every day."

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